Here's a link for those of you interested in first person accounts of the disempowering effect of co-dependency on those who feel in the spotlight when living with primary carer's who are compulsive rescuers (there's a particularly good entry under 'influence versus control').

www.talkaboutrecovery.com/group/alt.recovery.codependency/

Many people are not aware that co-dependency can effect people who are not partners/children of addicts/alcoholics/those with mental health issues. Nor are they aware that Co-dependency can disempower the 'cared for' person, lead to their progressive loss of self esteem, fear of self expression, shame/guilt about not living up to the expectations/desires of extremely helpful others, a crippling weight of 'gratefulness' that can severely lower one's feelings of self worth, progressive belief that one could never survive without the co-dependent person, intense fear in challenging the co-dependent's role as rescuer through one's own empowerment, a feeling of hopelessness that one is forever trapped in the role of 'cared for' person to the point one can feel allergic to such 'love' and progressively perceive it as 'invasion' to the point one closes oneself off to maintain any sense of self or integrity. Some therapists can have this, some teachers, certainly some carers. Fear or shame of recognising it in oneself is irrelevant. One is free to make changes to oneself or not.

It is worth thinking about. In my life, the ability to breath easy is so important and I meet so many people who can barely dare to do so.

if you are interested in Exposure Anxiety or in the nature of 'Simply Being' as described in Somebody Somewhere, I think you may find information about co-dependency of interest. If it plays a role in how someone responds to the challenges of Autism, or if such social pressure exacerbates gut/immune disorders, it is worth knowing. Especially as not only are the numbers of people with Autism growing, but so is our promotion and worship of Co-dependency as a society.